More People Who Say Stupid Things

We have needed a new roof since we moved into the house in March, but the hurricanes made our need immediate. As in, there is water on the bathroom floor after a rain. (At least it's in the bathroom, right? On tile.)

After Husband finally took my advice and filed an insurance claim, we are now able to mostly afford a new roof. Yay, Charley! Yay, Frances! Yay, Jeanne!

So last night a roofer came over to pound on our roof and tell us how much it would cost us. He was a nice guy, Dan, freckled, a hint of southern drawl. He sat at our kitchen table with Husband dishing about shingle availability and gutter options.

At one point, they discussed payment and Dan tells Husband that we can trust their company because the owner is a "good Christian man." This made me pause, but not halt, my preparation of sauteed honey-sesame chicken. There's nothing wrong with being a good Christian man, after all. I like good Christian men, just not any more than other good men.

And then they discussed plywood costs (I have a point here, I swear). Basically, plywood is a sliding cost because there's no way to know how much plywood we need to replace before the shingles are torn off. Husband said he wanted to cap the cost of plywood. To which softspoken Dan, who was a very good salesman and who we had now established was 22, had a girlfriend and lived in the area (Read: Potential friend) said...

"Don't worry. I won't Jew you."

OH, MY.

Don't worry. I didn't point to the menorah and punt him out of the house. I didn't order Husband to tackle him like a Green Bay Packer. I didn't even make him stand up and kiss the mezuzah. I just said, "We're not signing a contract with you tonight. Dinner is ready. Wrap it up."

I can't wait to tell him we're not going with him because he is an unobservant bigot.

His roof cost $900 extra anyway.